Still won't do it, naturally. Not even upping the dose, but the quantity. "It's too addictive, we might never get you off of it" I just don't understand. Upping the dose from 5mg every 8 hours to 10mg is too much? I mean jeez it doesn't last anywhere near 8 hours, maybe 3 or 4 but I literally don't feel the stuff at all anymore unless I take 15-20mg and even then it's not much, I need 20-25 to really actually feel it in some way similar to the beginning but still nowhere near what 7.5mg was able to do to me early last year. This isn't even slightly addictive for me and never has been. Sure it had a nice high when I was new to it but it still has never come anywhere close to weed. I've done a lot of stuff and THC will always be king. Hell, I find DMT more addictive than Valium. As far as I'm aware this is the least addictive benzo.
Saturday I actually had my first good stomach day since late June. No stomachache eating at work or coming home, none from niacin, none from burgers and hot dogs. Today suddenly was just like that, but then shortly before dinner I felt pain. Had spaghetti (only half a plate) and a salad and every bite was putting me in pain, been in a lot of discomfort for hours, but can't take the Valium dose I'd need because the dufus didn't listen to my instruction to re-fill a 10 day supply so that I'd be able to re-fill before leaving. I mean I was clear cut in that but he still sent a 15 day supply over meaning I have to purposely take lower doses or none some nights else I'll run out. Have to make 18 last until the 16th, and if I keep taking 15mg, I'll be out on the 14th. If he would've done it like I'd asked, I possibly wouldn't have needed a re-fill at all.
Why my stomach pulled a fast one on me I have no idea. It was some time after taking niacin, but it was the same lower dose, 600mg, that I've been taking ever since after I made this thread. Had zero issues with this dose in general since switching to it and I certainly didn't Saturday.
I believe I have gastritis, my constantly bloated stomach is probably all inflammation. Had heartburn the other night randomly after not having any for 10 months and I read H2 blockers can help with gastritis or ulcer, I don't know which it would be, seems more likely gastritis. Just in time to go see my family and am supposed to enjoy all my favorite foods. Most of my relatives will be busy for the rest of the year, so even though I wanted to re-consider and go in September, it turns out I can't. I'll need some real miracles from here.