FreedomCalls
Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 20, 2019
- Messages
- 74
Well guys, after a long winter of many unnecessary and unneeded drug binges, lots of money lost and damage done, I finally LOOK and FEEL somewhat presentable.
I am back stabilizing on suboxone, no more heroin in my veins, no cocaine in my body, no MDMA ... etc. No benzos... just suboxone. and alcohol.
But at least when I look at myself in the mirror I APPEAR healthy. While that's mostly not true, I can pull being fine to anyone really.
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BUT the most fucked up thing I did today is:
I just went in my garage, dug thru the trash for a USED UNCAPPED 18 gauge NEEDLE sitting in a pool of various wastes. I retrieved said MULTIPLE USED needle, washed it out 50 times, watered up 4 mg film of suboxone, sucked it up, and then...
To make matters worse,
I self mutalitated the SHIT out of myself becausae of how DULL and HUGE 18 gauge is, as I'm shooting I literally have blood POURING down my arm onto the floor. I HIT it. I did it right, but DAMN I bled like a mofo.
And I think damn, Imagine 8 year old me watching myself do that now.... I would be absolutely horrified. Even 13 or 16 year old me.
So guys, what's the most fucked up thing you did today?
I am back stabilizing on suboxone, no more heroin in my veins, no cocaine in my body, no MDMA ... etc. No benzos... just suboxone. and alcohol.
But at least when I look at myself in the mirror I APPEAR healthy. While that's mostly not true, I can pull being fine to anyone really.
-----
BUT the most fucked up thing I did today is:
I just went in my garage, dug thru the trash for a USED UNCAPPED 18 gauge NEEDLE sitting in a pool of various wastes. I retrieved said MULTIPLE USED needle, washed it out 50 times, watered up 4 mg film of suboxone, sucked it up, and then...
To make matters worse,
I self mutalitated the SHIT out of myself becausae of how DULL and HUGE 18 gauge is, as I'm shooting I literally have blood POURING down my arm onto the floor. I HIT it. I did it right, but DAMN I bled like a mofo.
And I think damn, Imagine 8 year old me watching myself do that now.... I would be absolutely horrified. Even 13 or 16 year old me.
So guys, what's the most fucked up thing you did today?